Imagine yourself at a Starbucks. The door of the coffee place is jammed, people inside are staring at you but no one is volunteering to help especially your friend who just got in. so you stand there, embarrassed feeling left out through the glass door staring at all the unknown faces who already feel like enemies you didn’t ask for and deal with the disappointment your friend caused.
Now let’s say you made it in somehow, and you are in the longest queue of all. So what is the surprise? You get to do the most not coveted activity of all. WAIT.
Yes you wait and while waiting your initial thoughts are about your order. You are excited that the wait is worth it. You will be enjoying the peace of sipping through your tall order. And all that happened so far will be forgotten and will submerge in that one sip.
Just when you think this is what it is going to end like, you notice a whole group of people cut the queue. Now this sort of thing never happens! But it was happening to you! And you begin to wonder why the rarest of all unfortunate things is happening to you. And the worst part is you are totally unequipped to deal the situation. You are not a fighter. You don’t argue. What can you do? You are only the door jammer everybody already knows you are. So what do you do?
You let them get in and you wait. You wait because you think slow and steady wins the race. You wait because you think all your life you have believed in fruits of waiting. Finally you make it to the end of the line. You are at the counter. You imagined heaven and you find yourself at the doorsteps.
And it’s your time now. It is your exclusive spot and time. Nobody can ruin this. You just have to make your order and receive it with you name on it. And cherish it and savor it.
Suddenly you notice the person who delivers the orders. Their shift changes and the new person comes in. there’s nothing wrong in that people change shifts all the time, except the previous person greeted everyone with a smile. And this person was already having grumpy look and you forgot how long you were taking to speak out your order. Their impatience and unpleasant look makes you nervous.
You begin to do what you never thought you would, stammer! And then comes what you ever wanted to happen in the first place. “Hey! Lady, There are tons of people in the line you don’t want them waiting for you to stare at my face right?”
And it wasn’t softly said. It felt like she fit an amplifier in her throat and as if yelling wasn’t enough it had to made sure everyone heard it.
Your eyes begin to tear up. You didn’t wait all this while for this?
You needed out!
You had had enough.
What you should have done in the first when the reception itself was wrong.
But it was Starbucks! Not some local coffee shop! It was not suppose to have been this way!
Yes marriage you think is your Starbucks! It can never go wrong. It is not supposed to go wrong. You don’t get the option of getting out of it.
Yes you do.
Now let me explain the story again in this context. Yes everybody wishes for the perfect marriage where nothing can go wrong. And everything is perfect. But it is not for you alone to enter it and dream for it on your own. The minute you sense no help or effort from your partner you should take steps to voice it out. Not stand at the door alone.
Secondly, when you see other people cut the line, that is take up the priority you are suppose to get you should not stand there and let them take it up, because they are old friends or family or people from work or anyone for that matter.
You came for the best experiences you are already waiting for it then why prolong the wait. Tell them things are changed now. And make sure you go in first and then everybody else. There is nothing wrong with that order.
And when you finally are faced with your time of confrontation or moment of voicing out and it runs out like how it did for the girl at the Starbucks. Then my friend you know you have to leave now.
Step out, because you were never meant to be taking coffee from that employee in the first place. You deserved the girl who greeted everyone with a smile.
You deserve Starbucks. And don’t let yourself think you got it unless you actually feel like it.
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